“Stood Up” by A Fine Frenzy

Today, I got some news.

It is good news. But it still scared me. Of COURSE!

Let’s back up a week.

Last Wednesday, the last day of my maternity leave, I decided to squeeze in a routine skin check with the dermatologist. I’m a fair-skinned Swedish-American. It is more than necessary.

The doctor took one look at a mole (which I now refer to as the “sinful mole”) and said, “I do not love that.” She examined it, measured it, reexamined it, measured it again, and decided she would have to punch it out or pop it off or whatever the exact verbage is. And so, she numbed it and removed it and sent it off to a lab to biopsy it, just to make sure.

Today I went in to have the stitches removed and (here comes the good news that still scares me)…

It is not cancerous.

Praise God!!!

It is, however, an atypical cellular blue nevus, and that means the cells were changing. The doctor has to go ‘back in’ and make sure it is all removed, all the way to the surrounding skin outside where the mole was, to the parameters. More stitches. Definitely a scar. No weight training. No fish oil. For the next three weeks or so.

I can still pick up my baby boy, though 😉

So, why does this scare me? It’s fine. FINE. I’m still perfectly healthy and, even though it stinks having to have a “surgery” for this, it will end well. The “odds are ever in my favor.”

It just makes me really consider the fact that, one day, the odds could turn. Someday, it may not be good news, perhaps, and can I be ready for that? I wasn’t ready for this, and it was actually good news. GOOD NEWS, PEOPLE!! I really just thought everything would come back normal. I had faith enough not to even give it another thought after the doctor initially removed the “sinful mole.”

And it makes me think of all the young mothers with truly terrifying tribulations, and how do they practice grace and courage in the face of all the things that plague them? I’d like to think I would. I’d like to believe that, if it were an Everest I was facing, and not this molehill (no pun intended), I would be able to wear this smile still and do this life with ball-busting gusto and extreme valiant grace.

At the least, I’d like to believe that I wouldn’t crawl into bed and never come out again.

It is a choice, to be courageous. No matter what we face, courage is always an option.

I just read today that God says 365 times in the Bible, “Do not be afraid.”

One reminder for each day of our year.

Do. Not. Be. Afraid.

Of anything.

I will obey. Right now.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Today’s Voice

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=hyusor1eVvY

We are not frightened anymore
We stood up, we stood up
And there are two of us, there will be more
They’ll show up, they’ll show up, they’ll show up

Blame a change of mind
A seismic shift in times
They told us not to fight
But we’ll fight it till we die

‘Cause we are not frightened anymore
We stood up, we stood up
And there are two of us, there will be many more
They’ll show up, yeah, they’ll show up

And so they sunk every ship we sailed
But we stood up, yeah, we stood up
And they fought hard but somewhere fighting failed
They’re all shook up, they’re all shook up, all shook up

Steel and concrete break
Beneath the steady waves
Of fearless hope and grace
In kindness there is strength

‘Cause we are not frightened anymore
We stood up, we stood up
And there are two of us, there will be more
They’ll show up, they’ll show up, yeah, they’ll show up

We are not, we are not, we are not, we are not
We are not, we are not frightened anymore
We are not frightened anymore

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